Day 13 - Bathrooms
Sunday 14th April
I suppose if you are going to discuss transgender issues then the topic of bathrooms has to come up at some point.
Since I transitioned the toilet issue has been one that I've been very aware of. If I'm out and about I either have to make sure that I don't need to go or if I do then look for facilities where I'm going to have the least possible bother.
So far I've been lucky and when I have needed to go have found single person unisex facilities. A while back while out with my son I even discovered that our town centre has some of these which was a real surprise, especially as I didn't realise that this set of public toilets were even there.
While out and about I have used dedicated female facilities on two occasions.
Once was while driving back from my parents and I needed to stop and use the facilities at a motorway services. On that occasion my other half came into the ladies with me, of course she finished her business before me and didn't wait for me so I had to wash hands, check my appearance and walk out on my own. Fortunately that trip to the bathroom passed uneventfully.
The only other time I've had to use the bathroom while out was during a trip to sort out hiring clothing for my son's ski trip at the beginning of the year. Caught short on the way back to the car I popped into the ladies in the car park while my family were outside. Nobody else was in there and I knew that my family were outside if there was any bother, or at least I thought they were but no they had wandered off back to the car.
The only other times that I've used toilets have been in a pub and I went at the same time as a friend who hung around. She did say to me before I went into the cubicle “remember to sit down and go like a woman”. As if I wouldn't do that.
Other than that when I've been at burlesque classes I've used the facilities and its been fine as it tends to be a private venue.
At work the situation has varied. At my normal place of work we have individual facilities as well as more communal women's facilities. I agreed with HR that I would use the individual facilities which is what I've pretty much done since I worked there anyway. On very rare occasions when I know that there aren't any other women around I've made use of the more communal ones.
Where I work at the moment HR told me that there were disabled toilets that I can use. Like anyone else, including some of the other women I've made use of these as sometimes they are the closest. After my first couple of days at the office though I started using the communal facilities as the office manager wasn't worried about which I used, she's female, and none of the other women have been fussed either.
When I get back to my normal place of work in May then I'll be back to using individual facilities, and that's fine. While I'm out and about though I'm going to have to get used to the idea that sometimes I'm going to have to use toilet facilities and accept the fact that just possibly I might get a negative reaction from another woman while in them. For someone that is transgendered that has to be part of becoming yourself and can't be escaped.