Tuesday, 19 January 2010

Telling loved ones - part 1

sissygurl belinda posted Cautionary note the other day. It started me thinking about my early days and telling people.

When I was growing up I was never a hit with the ladies. I didn't really have any girlfriends. To show you how successful I was the one girl that I got closest to dumped me telling me that she was going to become a nun!

To be honest it wasn't really a problem because even though I was so desperate to get into their panties, being a sissy, I was also desperate to get into their skirts and blouses.

It wasn't until I left home after university and started work that I found a girl that I really liked and who liked me to.

Marina and I got together through an advertisement in the personals of a local newspaper. She was sexy and took my virginity the first night I stayed at her place.

Things were good between us, I even got on really well with her daughter.

Ok, she had her faults, she couldn't handle her alcohol and got extremely drunk on white wine the one time she stayed at my place while my oldest friend and his girlfriend were also staying down. Not the best way to impress somebodies friends.

One evening while I was staying at her place we happened to be looking at some photos. In a couple of them were her ex-husband. I couldn't help noticing them because he was all dolled up in a dress. I could tell that it hadn't been a serious effort because he didn't have any makeup on and the outfit looked awful.

When I asked her aboout it, Marina told me that they'd been messing about.

I couldn't help thinking about this and one night a few days later brought up the subject of the pictures. As we lay in bed I told her that I had something to tell her. It was at that point that I bared all of myself to her and told her that I enjoyed dressing as a woman.

She was appalled, told me that I had to stop doing it and give it up completely. I was so shocked at the rejection but in love with her. I agreed to stop dressing as a woman.

Our relationship was Ok for a while longer but then went down hill. She got pregnant and miscarried.

Shortly after that I found myself as a cuckold boyfriend.

A taxi driver that she knew started calling around in the evenings. Some evenings I was even there. I'd find myself sitting in the lounge while they were in the kitchen chatting.

Eventually things got so bad that I couldn't take it anymore and told her that it was over.

I cried the day I packed my things and left. A few days later I returned with a friend, who turned out to be more supportive of me than anyone I've ever known, to collect the rest of my things. Again it was a very hard thing to do as I'd grown close to her daughter and it was hard having to tell her that we'd not be seeing each other again.

It took me a while to recover from the break up but eventually I decided that I had to try and find someone else.

The experience with Marine taught me a few things.

Firstly, never ever promise that you will stop being the feminine you. Unless you are really strong willed or not too deeply into your feminine side then it will be nearly impossible to keep that promise.

Secondly, love can blind us to other people's faults but there does come a time when you have to cut your loses.

Finally, good friends are priceless, they will tell you when they think that you are making a mistake. Preferably before you have gotten out of the situation and not afterwards. 20 - 20 hindsight is a wonderful thing but not much use really.

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