Saturday, 4 May 2019

Emotionally Tired

Feeling oh so tired today. 

Not physically despite having got nearly every one of my training sessions for the week in. Maybe not always on the right day but I've managed to get everything in this week. I've even seen some huge improvements in some cases. 

I think it's more of an emotional tiredness, a weariness of the soul.

Outside the house children and adults are playing, the sound of a football being kicked comes through the window. I remember when Rhys and I used to play football, rugby and other games outside. 

Listening to the sounds from outside, the noise of people, the wind blowing through the leaves on the tree making them rustle. My mind goes to a dark place and I imagine myself climbing onto the windowsill, leaning backwards out of the open window and letting myself drop the ground outside. I'd probably survive the fall and end up in hospital, or with my luck, survive unscathed.

I won't do that though. I'll just let the tiredness wash over me for a while, get a nights sleep and see what tomorrow brings. A better, less emotionally exhausted one I hope.

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