Back in 2016 I felt that I'd reached the point with this blog where I had nothing more to say and that it was time to move on.
I'd completed my journey through the medical system and come out the other side having done everything I needed to in order that I'd feel comfortable living in my own skin.
The last four years have been a challenge.
Some of my goals have fallen along the wayside. Others I've managed to achieve.
In 2017, Rhys was diagnosed with terminal cancer. On the 11th September he passed away quietly at our local hospice. The six months during which we knew that he was dying were packed full of life and memories.
Losing Rhys broke Tracey and I. Nothing can prepare you for losing a child, no matter their age. We both ended up having counselling and being prescribed anti-depressants. We've both struggled with the loss, and still do even now. We might be able to get through each day, we might be able to do all the normal things that others do but there is a large Rhys sized hole in our lives that can never be filled.
After Rhys died I started a blog as a way of helping me cope. I've imported those posts here and deleted that blog.
Just before Rhys was diagnosed with terminal cancer I had started a photography course, at foundation level. Last year I finished the course and decided that I would enrol on the first module of a photography course. I'm slowly working my way through that. I've enjoyed it, met new people through it and managed to learn so much more about the topic. I'm really enjoying it and will, hopefully, be carrying on with it over the next few years until I've completed it.
At work I've been involved with our company's LGBTQ+ network and have done a number of talks and training courses. Each has stretched me, while enabling me to share my story with others and help raise awareness of some of the issues that face the transgender community.
Which brings me to why I've decided to continue this blog.
The pandemic has given a lot of people the opportunity to take a fresh look at their lives and what they want from them. It's given us people the chance to look at the impact we have on the world around us, including our family, friends, neighbours and communities.
The events in America, and around the world, that have followed the death of George Floyd show that those minorities that are on the receiving end of hate and persecution are no longer willing to let things continue as they have been, and want change.
JK Rowling launched what people took as an attack on trans women and trans youngsters. Reading what people were saying on social media platforms like Twitter, was a tipping point for me. I've been quietly following what has been going on with regards to my community for a lttle while now. Life has been hectic but that's no excuse. I'm lucky and privileged. I've not received the harrassment that others have.
Over the last few days I've been considering what to do and come to the conclusion that, the very least I can do is to start sharing my story again.
It might not be exciting, it might not be interesting, but it's mine and its one of a trans woman who is simply trying to have a normal life, to do things with her friends and to enjoy the world that she lives in .Four years on since I said goodbye to this blog it's time to put fingers to keyboard and start writing again.